Tuesday, January 29, 2008


I got humus last night to finally try. I didn't know what kind to get for sure so I just got 'original'. The more I ate it the more I liked it. I offered it to a couple of my friends in my dorm, Aubrie was the only one who ate it and liked it. I thought about having some now actually, but decided it was too early in the morning to have humus. I will probably crave it during chapel too I guess. why is that? sometimes I wonder why we were created to have desires that repeat (does that make sense?). Maybe not even necessarily desires, but even other emotions or feelings. So many times I tell myself that I will never have that thought again or feeling again but it comes back like a boomerang.
Looked up the definition of sin on Wikipedia:
"Sin is often used to mean an action that is prohibited or considered wrong; in some religions (notably some sects of Christianity), sin can refer to a state of mind rather than a specific action. Colloquially, any thought, word, or act considered immoral, shameful, harmful, or alienating might be termed "sinful".
So does that mean that depression is a sin? Depression and thoughts of suicide? I have heard numerous times that those who are depressed are suffering a mental disability. So if depression is a sin, and all sin is equal, than is it still ok for a person to be in a leadership position or in a ministry position if they struggle with it? To have a leader who struggles with alcohol or drugs or pornography or stealing or adultery, they would be "relieved" of their position.

I am doing my speech in Public Speaking on depression. I was thinking about the cause and effect of depression and I was thinking about this. For those who struggle with months on and off of struggling with depression, not that they desire it, but it is like a boomerang.

Friday, January 25, 2008


"so much to do, and so little time to do it." sometimes i get caught looking at my schedule for the week and i feel overwhelmed. then i cant help but wonder what it will be like in 5 years. been pretty busy here but for the most part, i have been able to get at least 6 hours of sleep every night this week! :)

tomorrow i am helping out with a jr. high over-nighter. we are swimming at the high school, then bowling at a local bowling alley, coming back to the church and play games/watch movies/sleep, and then its over at 7:30am after breakfast. i am really excited for it, but right now, it just sounds very tiring. luckily, i will be done with classes by noon tomorrow, so i can nap before.

its so strange how each hour in the day goes by so slowly, but the day itself and the week go by SUPER fast.

i have more to type, but i need to either work on psychology or sleep....

until next time!